Ego and Heart

Episode 10

Scene 1

Anaya coffee shop se bahir nikli toh uske qadam ladkhada gaye. Jo thodi der pehle usne apne aap ko mazboot dikhane ka natak kiya tha, jo bolne ki himmat juti thi, wo sab bikhar chuka tha. Uska dil, jo abhi tak kisi umeed ke sahare chal raha tha, ab bejaan ho chuka tha. Aankhon ke samne sab andhera sa hone laga.

Hawa bhi aaj ajeeb si thi… jaise mazaak udaye, jaise yaad dilaaye ke wo kitni bewaqoof thi. Aarav ki woh hasi… woh shitaani muskurahat jo usne anaya ka mazak udaye waqt di thi… har baar anaya ke kaanon mein goonj rahi thi. “Tum middle class larkiyan na, jahan koi ameer banda thoda hass kar baat karle, wahan tumhein lagta hai woh tum par mar gaya hai!” Uske lafz har baar kanch ki tarah dil mein chubh rahe the.

Uski ankhein behne lagi thi, woh chalte chalte thak chuki thi, magar dil ke andar ka dukh kahin bhi rokne nahi de raha tha. Bus station tak ka safar usne kese tay kiya, ye usko khud nahi yaad. Bus mein baithi toh har chehra dhundhla nazar aane laga, aankhein nam thi, par chehra bejan.

Ghar pohchti hi bina kisi ko dekhe, bina kisi se kuch kahe, sedha apne kamre mein chali gayi. Jaise hi darwaza band kiya, saans jaise ruk gayi.

Chachi peechay peechay ayi thi. “Anaya! Darwaza kholo! Tumhari himmat kaise hui is tarah apne kamre mein jane ki!” Unki awaz guse se bhari thi, par anaya ka dukh itna gehra tha ke wo kuch sun nahi rahi thi. “Agar darwaza nahi khola toh acha nahi hoga, samjhi tum?” Chachi cheekh rahi thi, per anaya toh bas bed par gir gayi thi.

Aaj uska sab kuch loot gaya tha.

Woh wohi anaya thi jo chhoti chhoti khushiyon se jeeti thi, jo kisi ki chhoti si baat pe dil mein umeed bana leti thi, aur aaj? Aaj uska dil bejaan padha tha. Uska dil yeh yakeen hi nahi kar raha tha ke jo uske saath howa, woh haqeeqat thi. Har baar uska dimagh keh raha tha ke shayad yeh sab ek bura mazaak tha, shayad aarav waqai uske sath sirf mazaak kar raha tha, shayad abhi phone aayega aur woh kahega, “Anaya yaar mazaak tha, main sirf tumhe tang kar raha tha!” Magar nahi… uske phone ka screen khud hi is soch ka jawab de raha tha… aik bhi message nahi, aik bhi call nahi.

Aur phir anaya phoot phoot kar ro di.

Wo bilakh bilakh kar ro rahi thi, bed par lipat kar, apne haath apne moonh par rakhe taki uski aawaz kisi ko sunai na de. Uski har saans bojhal ho rahi thi. Uska har aansoo uske dil ke dukh ka gawah tha.

“Main bewaqoof thi… bohat badi bewaqoof,” woh tootay hue alfaz mein khud se keh rahi thi. “Mujhe lagta tha… woh bhi…” lekin baat mooh mein hi rukh gayi. Woh phir se zor zor se rone lagi.

Room ki deewaron tak ko uska dukh mehsoos ho raha tha. Chandni jo hamesha uske kamre se dikhai deti thi, aaj jaise andheron mein kho chuki thi. Aaj chand bhi uska gham mehsoos kar raha tha… aaj poori duniya uske dukh ka hissa lag rahi thi.

Aaj anaya tot chuki thi. Bikhar chuki thi. Aur sab kuch waisa nahi raha jaisa pehle tha…

Scene 2

Aarav coffee shop mein jahan khara tha, wahin jam sa gaya. Aaj uski jeet hui thi. Jo chahta tha, wo kar dikhaya tha. Aarav Kapoor ne Anaya ko tor diya tha, uski akkar ko mitti mein mila diya tha, uski aankhon ke chamak ko ansoo mein badal diya tha.

Magar… magar yeh jeet itni bekaar kyun lag rahi thi?

Dil mein ek ajeeb si bechaini thi.

Usne socha tha ke jab woh Anaya ko is tarah tod kar chala jayega, tab uske dil mein sirf sukoon hoga. Magar yeh kaisi uljhan thi? Yeh kyun lag raha tha ke andar koi cheez chub rahi hai?

Uska dil abhi bhi Anaya ki aankhon mein jam gaya tha. Woh aankhein jo hamesha noor se bhari hoti thi, aaj sirf dukh ka aaina thi. Woh halki si muskurahat, jo hamesha uske chehre pe hoti thi, aaj bilkul kho chuki thi. Aur sabse zyada jo cheez uske zehan se nahi nikal rahi thi, woh thi Anaya ke woh tootay hue lafz…

“Per… tum toh mujhe pasand—”

Aarav ne apni ungliyon ko apne balon mein pehra. Uske andar ek ajeeb sa gham utha jo woh pehchaan nahi paraha tha.

Tabhi peechay se Daniya ki aawaz ne use reality mein wapas khincha.

“Aarav, kya soch rahe ho?” Daniya ne hans kar uske shoulder par haath rakha.

Aarav ne ek pal ke liye aankhein band ki aur gehri saans li. Phir usne apni soch ko jhatka diya aur Daniya ki taraf dekha. “Kuch nahi.” Woh muskurane ki koshish karta hai, par uski muskurahat bejaan si thi.

Woh wapis Daniya ke paas aa kar beth gaya, par uska dil… uska dil ab bhi coffee shop ke darwaze par hi atka tha, jahan se Anaya aankhon mein aansu liye chali gayi thi.

Usne koshish ki, khud ko distract karne ki, Daniya ki baatein sunne ki, magar har baar Anaya ka chehra uski soch mein waapis laut aata. Uske woh behte aansu… uske woh dukh bhari aankhein… woh shikayat se bhari awaz…

Kya yeh sab sirf ek game tha?

Nahi… yeh game tha. Bas ek game. Usne apne aap ko yaad dilaya.

Lekin phir bhi, kyun aaj pehli baar jeet kar haar jaisi mehsoos ho rahi thi?

Jab uska dil aur zyada bechain hone laga, jab har chehra dhundhla hone laga aur sirf Anaya ka dukh bhara chehra dikhai dene laga, toh woh achanak uth khada hua.

Daniya ne hairani se dekha, “Aarav? Kahan ja rahe ho?”

Aarav ne bas ek pal ke liye use dekha, par koi jawab nahi diya. Aur woh deta bhi kya? Usse khud nahi pata tha ke woh kahan ja raha hai. Uske dil mein sirf ek ajeeb si khalish thi jo usse chain nahi lene de rahi thi.

Aarav bina kuch kahe coffee shop se bahar nikal gaya.

Daniya bhi hairani se uske peeche chali gayi, magar Aarav ab sirf ek bechain insaan tha, jo khud ko bhi nahi samajh paraha tha.

Scene 3

Anaya subah uthi toh uska pura jism toota hua lag raha tha. Sar bhaari tha, aankhein jalan se laal ho chuki thin, aur har saans lene mein bhi takleef ho rahi thi. Sari raat roti rahi thi, aur ab fever bhi ho gaya tha.

Usne bohot mushkil se uth kar apne phone ka screen dekha, fingers bhi itni kamzor lag rahi thi ke type karna mushkil ho raha tha. Kahin jaane ki himmat nahi thi, isliye usne office mein leave application bhej di. Luckly wo approve bhi ho gayi. Ab aur kuch karne ki taqat nahi thi, isliye wapis bistar par gir gayi.

Uska jism toota hua tha… par sabse zyada uska dil toota tha.

Aankhein band ki toh kal k din ka har lamha phir se dimaag mein ek flim ki tarah chalne laga. Aarav ka wo mazak udhata chehra… uske woh dil todne wale alfaz…

“Mein Aarav Kapoor tum jese kisi bhi airi giri larki ko pasand nahi karta…”

“Tum middle class larkiyan bohot jald umeed laga leti ho…”

“Hello, asli duniya mein aajao…”

Uska dil ek baar phir se dukh ki inteha tak pahunch gaya. Anso phir se aankhon se beh nikle. Kitni bewakoof thi woh! Kitni badi ghalti ki thi usne jo Aarav ko apna sab kuch samajh baithi thi…

Par ab koi faida nahi. Kuch bhi nahi badal sakta.

Anaya ne rumaal se apne anso pochne ki koshish ki, par wo bechaini kam nahi ho rahi thi. Uska dil chah raha tha ke wo cheekh cheekh kar roye, par awaaz bhi band ho gayi thi.

Tabhi darwaza zor zor se bajne laga.

“Anaya! Ye kiya tamasha laga rakha hai kal shaam se!” Chachi ki gusse se bhari awaaz aayi.

Anaya ne aankhein zor se band karlein. Bas, ab aur nahi. Aur nahi seh sakti. Har waqt ki daant, har waqt ki zaleel karne wali baatein, ab aur nahi!

Darwaza aur zor se bajne laga.

“Anaya! Khol darwaza warna tod dungi! Beghairat larki, mujhe kal se gussa dila rakha hai!”

Anaya ka dil chaha ke bas sab khatam ho jaye. Uska dil, uski saansein… sab.

Usne apni maa aur baba ka yaad kiya.

“Mama, baba… please mujhe apne paas bula lo… mujhe nahi rehna yahan…”

Wo betahasha ro rahi thi. Poore dil se, poore dukh se.

Koi nahi tha jo uska haath thamta. Koi nahi tha jo uska dukh samajhta. Yeh duniya sirf dhokebaazon se bhari hui thi. Aarav bhi dhokebaaz, uske apne ghar wale bhi… koi bhi uska nahi tha.

Tabhi darwaza phir zor zor se bajne laga.

Anaya ne rone ka gala ghont diya. Ab aur nahi… ab is dukh ko chupana hoga.

Usne apni aankhein poonchi, bohot mushkil se apne thakte hue jism ko uthaya aur darwaza khola.

Jaise hi chachi samne aayi, unka gussa phir se phoot pada. “Ab jaag gayi hai madam! Subah se pagal bana rakha hai, har waqt tamasha—”

Aur phir ekdum khamoshi chha gayi.

Anaya ek dum se hilne lagi, uski aankhon ke aage sab ghoomne laga… aur phir wo behosh ho kar chachi ke haathon mein gir gayi.

Chachi ka gussa ek pal mein hawa ho gaya. “Anaya! Anaya!” Unhone jhat se chacha ko awaaz di.

Chacha daud kar aaye. “Kya huwa?!”

“Yeh behosh ho gayi hai, jaldi chalo hospital!” Chachi ne hairani aur tension se kaha.

Pehli baar, uski is halat ko dekh kar chachi bhi dar gayi thi.

Doctor ne check up karne ke baad gehri saans li. “Stress ki wajah se BP bohot low ho gaya hai. Drip lagani padegi, tabhi thodi der mein hosh aayega.”

Chacha ne tension se poocha, “Ab yeh theek ho jayegi na?”

Doctor ne sir hilaya. “Jee, par usko aaram ki zaroorat hai. Stress bilkul nahi lena chahiye.”

Chachi ne ek pal ke liye Anaya ka feeka aur bejaan chehra dekha. Jo larki hamesha chup chaap magar sab kuch seh leti thi, aaj itni bejaan kyun lag rahi thi? Pehli baar chachi ke dil mein ajeeb si soch ayi… kahin unhone is masoom larki ke sath zyada hi bura toh nahi kiya?

Magar phir unhone sir hilaya. “Ajeeb natak hai!”

Lekin unki awaz pehle jesi shiddat mein nahi thi.